This is my first Christmas without my family. Well, I take that back. This is my first year in which I will wake up on Christmas morning, and not be with my parents and little brother. This would not bother me as much if it were not for the fact that not only is Matthew deployed, but I probably won't get to talk to him on Christmas as well. I'm not really too sure how to handle it.
I've been trying to keep a happy face on for the last week and today, I just can't. This is especially bad since tonight is a "family dinner" at Chili's since its the last day before the holidays that people have time, and both Michael and I are here. I'm not too sure how I feel about going to this. But I've been sleeping practically all day.
No, really. I woke up at 8am, went back to sleep, woke up at 11-12ish, took a shower, ate, went back to sleep, and finally got up for good around 5. I feel like a lazy bum, but its better than having to deal with emotions headon when I'd rather ignore them so I dont spend all day crying.
I've been trying to keep a happy face on for the last week and today, I just can't. This is especially bad since tonight is a "family dinner" at Chili's since its the last day before the holidays that people have time, and both Michael and I are here. I'm not too sure how I feel about going to this. But I've been sleeping practically all day.
No, really. I woke up at 8am, went back to sleep, woke up at 11-12ish, took a shower, ate, went back to sleep, and finally got up for good around 5. I feel like a lazy bum, but its better than having to deal with emotions headon when I'd rather ignore them so I dont spend all day crying.
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